Blåhaj PieFedBriar - secure p2p group communications
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Possibly linuxBriar is a messaging app designed to be used by groups of people to allow for secure and censorship resistant communications.
This technically isn’t self hosted in the strictest sense but I think it is still relevant.
I’m never going to recommend something that I can’t get to work reliability. Also the lack of a security audit is a major deal breaker.
Communications is one of those things that needs to be absolutely solid.